MONTICELLO, Va. – Archaeologists working at Thomas Jefferson’s primary plantation, otherwise known as Monticello, have unearthed a cache of historic documents which provide a glimpse into the mind of the late Thomas Jefferson. The vast majority of the recovered documents were penned by Mr. Jefferson himself and, according to historians, are in “pristine condition.”
Included in the discovery is a six volume leather-bound journal in which the third president of the United States kept meticulously detailed notes and diagrams of cloud formations which he observed from the roof of Monticello. In one particular entry, next to a sketch of what is likely a Cirrus cloud, Mr. Jefferson wrote that it resembled “the finest and most delicate wisps of hair, the likes of which one finds dangling about a periwig.”
Another set of documents found locked away in an iron safe beneath a store house on the grounds of Monticello known as the ‘Negro Quarter,’ appear to be the minutes recorded from a series of private meetings between Thomas Jefferson, Benjamin Franklin, and John Adams. In the records, the Founding Fathers weigh the pros and cons of including certain aspects of Sharia Law in the final draft of the U.S. Constitution.
John Adams expresses some doubts as to whether a need to include “such minute details” could be viewed as “obtrusive” by future generations of lawmakers. However, all three agree that Sharia Law should not be entirely removed from the American system of government. “It is indeed the most efficient way of resolving simple domestic issues,” noted Mr. Jefferson, to which Mr. Franklin wholeheartedly agreed, adding that Sharia Law should be implemented at the very least to “resolve petty criminal infractions.”
Officials at Jefferson’s Monticello say the documents will be made available to the general public along with other recently discovered artifacts once archaeological analysts have had a chance to thoroughly inspect and log them.