George Clooney Claims Exhaustion, Anxiety, Postpones Filming Following Fork Incident

EDINA, Mn. – Academy Award winning actor George Clooney is refusing to leave his trailer on the set of the latest Cohen brothers’ film in Edina, Minnesota, after an incident at a nearby Cheesecake Factory left the actor with a strong distaste for the sweet dessert.

On Friday, April 21st, Mr. Clooney and his wife, Amal, dropped by the Cheesecake Factory on Southdale Circle in downtown Edina, where they shared a slice of Mango Key Lime cheesecake. “They liked it so much, they ordered a second slice,” Assistant manager Blanche Wilson later told TMZ. “In fact,” she added, “Mr. Clooney bought everyone who was in the restaurant that day a slice of cheesecake.”

However, after Mr. Clooney settled his bill and left, Blanch told TMZ she “swooped in before the busboy” and rescued a salad fork used by Clooney. “I just knew I was holding a piece of history,” she said. The fifty-nine year-old assistant manager said she rushed to the kitchen where she expertly used a vacuum storage bag to preserve the treasured fork before listing it on the popular online auction site, eBay, with a jaw-dropping starting bid of one million dollars.

Within an hour, an intense bidding war erupted between at least two potential buyers. “I couldn’t believe my eyes,” Blanche said. “Every time I logged in, there was a new bid.” By the following morning, the auction had ended and Blanche Wilson was suddenly – and remarkably – eight million dollars richer. “I was ecstatic,” she told TMZ. “The first thing I did was call my hair dresser and make an appointment.”

In an exclusive interview with Real News Right Now, George Clooney, speaking via Skype from inside his trailer, revealed that it was he who had placed the winning $8 million bid on the salad fork. “I’m just not comfortable with the idea of strangers having my DNA,” Clooney explained before adding that the mere thought of someone having something he’s touched leaves him crippled with anxiety.

Mr. Clooney told Real News Right Now that over the last decade, he’s spent upwards of one hundred million dollars in online auctions in an effort to prevent his DNA from falling into the wrong hands. “I’ve got a little operation in my basement where I pay a couple of neighborhood kids twelve bucks an hour to scour the Internet and bid on things that I’ve had contact with,” Clooney said, adding that if he had the time to do it himself, he would.

Clooney had reportedly visited the Cheesecake Factory in Edina to prepare for his role as ‘Pete’ in the latest Cohen brothers’ film, ‘Cheesecake Factory,’ a period piece set in the early 1990’s, according to the actor’s publicist.

R. Hobbus J.D.

Investigative Journalist

R. Hobbus J.D. is an internationally acclaimed independent investigative journalist specializing in international politics, health, business, science, conflict resolution, history, geography, mathematics, social issues, feminism, space travel, civil rights, human rights... more

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